I went to a sentencing hearing last week. Last June, a teenager brutally beat up Russell Mikolas, a 64-year-old homeless man. They had never met; there was no reason for the teen to initiate such brutality. Instead of trying to fight back or even defend himself, Russell tried to run away. The teen chased Russell and beat him up some more. Russell died about a month later as a result of his injuries.
I didn’t know Russell, but a friend of mine knew him well — she was his advocate and friend. I went to his celebration of life last year. Over a year later now was the teen’s sentencing hearing. I didn’t want to go, yet it feels important to be there — to honor Russell’s life, to honor my friend’s loss, Russell’s family’s loss, and our community’s loss, and to bear witness to a process that aims towards justice. I don’t know what justice would even look like in this case, yet showing up to support the concept seems important.
Part of me made peace with going, even knowing emotions will be hard in so many directions. Part of me wonders what can go so wrong to have a child murder a fellow human being who has done no harm to him? How does that happen? What happened to the kid? Did he experience horrific nature and/or nurture? Did he experience abuse and/or neglect that left him anger and no empathy? Was he struggling with addiction? Mental illness?
None of those possibilities can change the kid’s actions that day, and none of those possibilities absolve his responsibility. Yet any of those possibilities might help make some sort of twisted sense out of this. Wishing for at least that, as the universe owes me nothing.
I wondered how it would feel to be in the court room and see the teen. Would I feel angry, sad, both, or other things? Do we find empathy for him, even though he had none for Russell? I wonder what would Jesus do? If we leave it to some god to judge, what is our role? To keep the kid locked up so he never does this again? Do we befriend him to offer love anyway, and to plant seeds of empathy, whether or not he will ever be free again? Do we punish, or try to rehabilitate? Is the latter even possible? My thoughts and emotions were, and still are, everywhere, and none of that matters. It was important to go to the hearing.
Things I didn’t know: The court had “sides” like a wedding where the bride’s family usually sits on one side, and the groom’s family sits on the other side. Except here it’s victim’s family on one side, and the kid’s family on the other side. A local reporter, my friend and her friend who also knew Russell, and I were first of the audience people to be there, and we sat on the victim’s side, but we didn’t know that at the time, as people came and almost filled the other side.
The court was expecting a lot of Russell’s family members, so they gave the reporter a special seat on the side, and had the three of us move to the other side, to leave room for the victim’s family. Reasonable, yet pretty awkward to appear to be seated with and aligned with “them” – the family of the murderer.
The kid wasn’t there yet. And eventually, he was escorted in, with hands and feet in shackles. I expected to see a monster. Instead, I saw a skinny small-medium build teenage kid. And he’s a murderer. As he’s also a skinny teenager.
So many thoughts rushed into my mind. How do nature and nurture play out for any of us? Are some people evil from the start, regardless? Who would we be if any of us were dealt a horrific hand of nature and nurture? Could I have had a child who commits horrors, even if I raised him well? Is any of this luck of the draw, or destiny or the act of demons or devils, if any such things exist? Nothing absolves the kid of his actions. Yet so many questions seem to matter.
We had heard that the brutality of his actions meant that he would be tried as an adult. The court conversations shared that the legal rules allow that only if the minor has already been through programs that support kids in trouble or at-risk, with those programs not working. This kid had not been in that system, and the prosecution felt that lacking that, they couldn’t meet the legal requirements to try him as an adult.
The kid had confessed to murder, and was accepting his sentence today instead of going to trial. The judge double checked that in many ways — he loses the chance for a trial if he accepts sentencing today, so they want to be sure he’s making a very informed decision.
The prosecutor shared that this has been his most heart-wrenching case in the two decades he’s done this work because of the intense violence, and it was very hard to accept trying the teen as a minor, but the legality left him no choice. He spoke to the teen about how this reality means that he’ll be in custody till he’s 25 years old, so the kid is getting a second chance, and please know how lucky he is, and use this opportunity to get all the help he needs, and then do good in life.
Russell’s daughter and his nephew spoke about Russell and how kind and fun he was when he wasn’t struggling. Russell’s family seems to have learned at least a few things about the kid’s life. It was powerful when Russell’s daughter shared a little about her own childhood, and how in spite of harm and trauma that happened to her and her siblings, none of them ever chose to brutally murder a stranger.
She shared that she spent two weeks at the hospital with Russell after he was beaten, and she could barely recognize him and his brain was swollen from the injuries and she hoped that he’d gain consciousness and flash even a moment of recognition of her, but that moment never happened. Eventually, she had to make the decision none of us ever want to make, to release a loved one to die.
Russell’s daughter and nephew conveyed anger that the kid wasn’t being tried as an adult. And yet both of them also shared that this is an opportunity. Take all the classes. Learn to manage anger, get clean, get therapy for whatever abuse or neglect he experienced, value the second chance he is getting, never forget Russell and what he did to Russell, yet do good from this point forward, give back, and have a good life. Because in spite of what he did, in spite of their anger, sadness, and irreplaceable loss, they want that for him, and Russell would want that for him. I sat in teary awe as I witnessed the grace that Russell’s family gave. Maybe they used their tears to build the high road?
The judge and prosecutor echoed those wishes for the kid. I saw monstrosity and I saw a kid in tears, trying to wipe his eyes as his hands are shackled. The kid also shared a statement. His hands were shaking as he read his words, conveying apologies and no excuses. He spoke fast, which seemed to some as if he’s not sincere, just afraid and saying what people want him to say, in case it helps reduce his sentence or future chances.
It’s beyond my capacity or earthly pay grade to know if someone else’s words in this situation are sincere or self-serving or both. I almost caught my kitchen on fire this morning. I’m not qualified to boil water today, much less know a stranger’s depth of truth, sincerity, or remorse.
I just know that Russell’s family took a high road I aspire to live. And I saw a kid who did an irrevocable monstrous thing, and will pay for that, whether or not he will pay “enough” by anyone’s standards or preferences.
My friend yelled “Murderer!” as she left the court room. And the kid IS a murderer. I worry and wonder what else he might become. As I also wonder what else Russell might have become? What dreams, reconciliations, healings, and life moments will he never be able to have? There’s plenty of wondering to go around here.
And I saw the murderer’s family passing me Kleenex to wipe my tears.
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Lynelle Wilcox has served people experiencing homelessness in Salem for six years - initially volunteering at warming centers and homeless events. As people shared their stories through the years, she saw how much a smile and hello can create commonality, connection, and sometimes hope. And hope can change everything. She writes about some of the things she’s learned along the way, and shares some of the stories. She adores her kids, and loves vivid colors, cats, happy clothes, music, cooking, skies, dogs, and daisies
